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LIFE GUIDE
How to plan a destination wedding

By Sarah Lindner
AMERICAN-STATESMAN STAFF
Sunday, June 22, 2008

Before she got married last December, Julie Stone had been a bridesmaid 15 times and had seen her share of stress-filled weddings. She knew that she didn't want to be one of those anxious brides when she tied the knot with Joe Frederick (both are lawyers in Austin). The couple also knew they didn't like the mounting list of costs as they planned their wedding.

The solution to both those concerns came when they changed their plans from an in-town wedding to a destination wedding in Manuel Antonio, Costa Rica. Stone estimates they trimmed their costs by half, which let them splurge on a memorable fireworks display at the reception.

And besides saving money, there was another benefit. Stone had heard other couples say their weddings were over before they knew it and that they barely had time to greet guests. Because it included several days of activities, her destination wedding gave her more time to savor the experience with loved ones who had come to celebrate with her.

Destination weddings are becoming more popular with Austin couples, says Tanya Posavatz, owner of Clink Weddings (clinkweddings.com) in Austin. This week and next, we'll be giving you some tips on hitting the road to say "I do."

Decide if it's for you

Though destination weddings are popular, they aren't for everyone.

Are you OK if fewer people can come to your wedding? "You should know that the majority of the people probably will not be able to attend," Stone says. Her guest list went from 150-200 to about 45. "It makes your wedding smaller, but therefore it also cuts down on a lot of costs and makes it much more intimate."

Will the key people you want to be there be able to make the trip? (More on this in the next section.)

Do you relish all the decisions involved in wedding planning, or do they stress you out and overwhelm you? A destination wedding could narrow down your options and take away some of that worry, Stone says. For example, there are scores of options for your reception music when you get married in Austin. In Costa Rica, Stone was choosing from only a handful.

"Make sure you're the kind of bride who can let go of details," says Posavatz.

Can you shrug and laugh if everything isn't perfect? "You have to be ready to be flexible, go with the flow and have a sense of humor," says videographer Ashley Chiles (ladyflash.com), who's shot her share of destination weddings.

Stone's flowers and cake weren't what she pictured, but it was no big deal to her.

"If I had been here in Austin, I think I would have been a lot more upset that things were not just so, but you're on vacation! And the important thing is your friends and family are there and you're in a beautiful place."

Pick a destination

When you're thinking about where to get married (or whether to have a destination wedding at all), it doesn't just come down to whether you like tropical beaches or cool mountain air better. Think about your guests, too. "You have to really consider what you're asking your friends and family to do," Chiles says. Some key points to consider:

Would most of your guests want to visit this destination? Because of the time and expense involved in getting to your wedding, "consider a spot that not only you and your groom would love to go, but that your friends and family would love to go," Chiles says.

Make sure everyone can physically get to your destination, Chiles says. If your grandfather is in failing health, for example, he might not be able to make a long journey.

Can everyone afford this destination? "Not all of your friends and family have your budget to travel that far," Chiles says. Expenses add up quickly.

"You want to pick a place where the airfare isn't exorbitant," Stone says. One of the reasons she and her husband chose Costa Rica was that most of their guests would be flying from the East Coast.

On the same note, unless all of your guests are flush, don't pick a destination that has only high-end accommodations, Chiles and Stone both said. Although Stone's guests were all in the same hotel, it offered rooms at a variety of prices.

You also can time the trip so that it will be less expensive for guests (and you, of course). Stone's wedding was the last week of Costa Rica's rainy season, when prices are lower.

Have a destination picked out? Next week we'll look at all the details that go into planning the trip and the wedding.